ReMindEd   •   January 23, 2017

Sitting here on a Monday morning, like many others, the sun arose early, the birds welcomed me into the day, the stirring of children starting to wake in their beds, the sunlight peeking from slits in the blinds: but on this day, my youngest child starts school.

I have had three before him, face this day, the first time they are dressed head to toe in matching shirt, shorts and hat, with white edged socks and black school shoes, with that huge backpack on their backs, with a look of excitement and hesitation in their eyes. But today, it’s the last time this will be this first time.

And for me and my husband, the reality of what this day means has started to rear it’s head, and there’s been moments of quick glances of teary cornered eyes as we avoid looking too long at each other to keep the flow at bay.

We have spoken about this day, we have planned for it, yet now we are here, it feels different than expected, yet also the same. For this is an end of an era. The era of having toddlers at home, of navigating different daily schedules between school and kinder or day care, and work. They, all four, are now in school. For us, that means 830-3pm, they are all there- three in Primary, and one in High School. We now have five days a week to work, run the house, shop for food- all without little people in tow. And nothing against the parents who are genuinely relieved to see this day, I’m not.

I’m one of those parents who loved the company, the consistency, the ‘having someone else to think about’. I can say that now, as I truly did. But I don’t think I realised that at that time. When that was my day in day out, without a break, a day off, a rest, it was tough. There were days I longed for solitude, quiet, sleep. Or just to go for a run right now because I could, to only realise I couldn’t. Everything was planned around having the littles with me, at home, around them.

The questions that come up for me are:

Did I do enough to let my little people know I loved having them with me when they were?

Did I play enough, laugh and dance and have fun enough with them?

Did I teach them the skills they need to be enough of a good person and a good student?

Was I enough as a Mum?

Was I enough?

And that question is one we all ask ourselves as parents.

So here’s my encouragement today:

No matter where you are on your journey as a parent: whether your first child is starting school today- oh I remember that day well!- whether you have all at home or all at school or all grown up and moved away from you:

You are enough. You were chosen to be your child’s parent for a reason. They were entrusted to you. You are doing, and have done, and will do, the best job you can. And okay is good enough. You are good enough. You are enough.

Hold your head high Mum- you’ve got this!

Stand strong Dad- they need you!

And send them off into the world, surrounded with all you have taught them, without even realising it, and watch them as they grow into amazing human beings!

And go easy today. Have a coffee. Walk on the beach. Take a longer lunch. They’ll be home from their first day soon- and they come home to you!

Much love,

Sal

#bravenewyear